Thanks to your friends at the National Basketball Association ("NBA"), the National Football League ("NFL"), and Major League Baseball ("MLB") you can study for law school and keep up with the latest news on ESPN.com all at the same time!!!
Need to work on Criminal Law? Why don't you try to think of a defense for Michael Vick! If that's too easy, and you want to move onto something more complex, "Sports Defense" (a new field, not to be confused with actually playing defense, and a term coined and owned by yours truly) has a more challenging case study for you: Pac-man Jones! Don't know how to handle multiple charges all over the country at the same time? Watch ESPN's SPORTSCENTER to find out how you can shuffle court dates in Nashville, Las Vegas, and North Georgia so that you're client can be where he needs to be, when he needs to be there [note, this is not true if "where he needs to be" is suiting up for his team's game and "when he needs to be there" is every Sunday].
Those of you fortunate enough to attend one of the higher-class State Schools may have a chance to get in on the ground floor with an up-and-coming deviant. Just look at U.T., a football roster just over flowing with potential clients. Successfully defend one of these rising-stars and you're sure to get an A+ in Criminal Law. Its like they say about the weather: "Run out of people to defend? Wait a few minutes, football practice is about to get out."
Find even that to be too boring? Test your hand with R.I.C.O. law. That's right, the NBA has offered you a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to get a crash course in Racketeering. Want to know how people fix sporting events? Curious how an NBA Referee could become the squeeze point of a New England Mob Family? Want to know how to protect your client from the shame and humiliation that will accompany being outed as the "devastator of our most trusted profession." Wait . . . Don't we usually yell at the Ref for getting it wrong? Hey, NBA Officials have always made Lawyers look trustworthy!
Want to get some real "pre-trial litigation" experience? Follow the ever-present B.A.L.C.O Grand-Jury testimony, and accompanying Congressional Hearings. Its a unique look at the interplay between our Federal Government and Professional Sports. We are lucky that the good people on Capital Hill could make time for our lesson all while cleaning up the nation's past-time.
Yes, you may think that being a Law Student means that you won't have time for sports anymore. You may think that you'll just have to catch a box-score or two when you can. Maybe you'll get to watch the playoffs (Tough chance, it's ALWAYS exam time when Football and Basketball count). Well think again, thanks to today's modern role-models and the 24-hour news cycle, you can keep up with Sports and study for those midterms all at once.
Remember, SPORTSCENTER is conveniently aired for 8 straight hours overnight, just to accommodate your study schedule.
Stay Tuned...
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